Weird Pregnancy Dreams? I Need Yours!
May 17, 2008 by Dr. Heather
Filed under Pregnancy, Sleep
Miriam in Florida emailed me with some fascinating questions about dreams, whether her baby Griffin could be having them at night when he whimpers and cries in his sleep, and about her own dreams, when she was pregnant with him.
There’s a great article here if you want to read about infant dreams, and I like the Dr.
Greene site in general. So check that out. But before you go over there, finish
this post, because I need your help. I’m planning a series on Pregnancy Dreams,
and I need your submissions!
I’m fascinated by dreams, and there are some interesting commonalities among pregnancy dreams. They tend to be unusually vivid, action-packed, and bizarre. We tend to remember them better than at other times of our lives, too.
Miriam recalls, from one of her pregnancy dreams:
I’m boiling potatoes in a giant stock pot on the floor in the kitchen. There is no steam, but I know they’re boiling. I’m stirring them with a long-handled slotted-spoon. The water begins
to boil away and now I am sauteeing them in the same pot. My husband is trying
to get me to make some chicken, then says that we need to go burn the marshland
to get rid of the mosquitoes. I tell him we have to talk to the committee about
it.
Right off the bat, of course I’m thinking of “cooking the
potatoes” as a metaphor for pregnancy. But I need Miriam’s reflections and
associations to help better understand the rest of the meaning of the dream.
She included some of the background in her email to me, so when I compile the
series, I’ll be able to share some of my interpretations with you.
I hope you’ll dig up your pregnancy journals and submit some of your own dreams to me and I’ll include them with the series. It promises to be fun, interesting and illustrative of the powerful
experience of pregnancy!
My last pregnancy (which sadly ended in a miscarriage at 9 weeks), I had a dream that I woke up in the delivery room having already delivered the baby. One of my mommy friends was there with me; I’m not sure where my husband was. When she told me I’d already had the baby and the doctor never woke me up for it, I was very angry! Then the next day, still in the hospital, the baby (it was a boy) was already running circles around the hospital room and talking! His first words were “I like vaginas!”
weird weird weird…….If anyone can tell me what that all means, I’ll be really impressed.
I can’t remember how far along I was now, but I think I was somewhere in the middle of the pregnancy. Anyway, it was around the time that “Rent” came out as a movie and also at that time was when Gabrielle on Desperate Housewives lost her baby and went with that guy to let go of the red balloon. (I promise this is important in a min.) Ok, so I dream that I have had the baby, but it is a balloon. Yep, a balloon baby. As if that’s not weird enough, I decide I want to try out for Rent. So I go to this auditorium, but I don’t know what to do with my balloon baby, so I put the balloon in my duffle bag while I go up on stage to try out!! After I get done, I come back to check on my balloon baby, but it had deflated and I was really devastated!! How strange is that?!?! Believe me, after that dream, I really started freaking out about how good a parent I would be!!
KIMI:
Sorry about the loss. I lost one at 9 weeks too.
The thing about your husband not being there: A lot of these dreams have themes of being afraid we’ll have to do it by ourselves. And your doc delivering without your knowledge: feeling out of control. It’s really interesting how common those themes are!
As for the little boy running around screaming about va jay-jays, I think I’d need your associations to figure that one out!
SHARON:
Yup, those dream themes are common too; the fears that we will be inadequate as mothers, and do something really blatantly stupid (like putting your kid in a duffel bag). I once dreamt that I’d gone to work and only realized when I came home that the baby was in the crib alone all day!
Just a guess on the red balloon thing, but it seems to me perhaps to be related to fears about miscarriage. Another common theme/fear throughout pregnancy.
Roving velociraptors were invading a furniture store, and I had to beat them to death with a fire poker to save my family. Protective much?
When I was pregnant with #1, I dreamed I was having twins- a boy and a girl- that were a surprise because twins didn’t show up on any tests. After they were born (in the dream), I told the doc to tie my tubes because I was DONE.
After #1 girl child was born, we had this brass headboard with vertical rails. I used to dream we were having a natural disaster of some kind- earthquake, fire, flood, etc.- and that the baby was on the other side of the rails and I couldn’t get to her. I would frequently wake up with my hands between the rails clawing at the wall behind the bed.
My dreams are very active and colorful, and I sleepwalk too. My poor husband has put up with this for 12 years now- oh, the stories I could tell you…
I had the same dream for all three pregnancies – and it was that my teeth were falling out – I’d just be talking, and my teeth would start falling out and all this blood would come out of my mouth – it didn’t hurt… it was FREAKY!
I also tended to have rather erotic dreams about certain celebrities LOL
Mmm. I remember dreaming that I had had the baby, and put her down, and then I realized a while later that I had no idea where she was. She was walking along a cliff and my mother turned and looked at me and said, ‘what kind of mother are you?’
THAAANKS, mom.
Was that picture taken at a baby shower? If so, why wasn’t I invited?
During my first pregancy, I had a recurring dream that my baby came out with lots of really dark hair. I cried because I expected my baby to be a toe-head (white/blonde hair) like me.
NATALIE:
I would say so! Primitive protective instincts. It’s absolutely genetic. Ingrained.
MAMABIGDOG:
The dreams about the baby being in distress, in bed with you, are really common. I remember having several myself that were just like that…and we never did co-sleeping (my DH is too afraid he’d squish somebody!)
DAWN:
I love the teeth falling out theme; that’s one of the most common dream themes (pregnant or not), overall. I think it has to do with a feeling of loss of power, not being able to “get your teeth” into something.
ALIANORA:
Hah! I can totally hear my Mom saying the same thing.
Another super-common theme. “What kind of mother will I be? Am I up to the task? What if I make an incredibly stupid blunder?”
HOT WIFE:
Somehow, the toe-head thing never materialized, did it?
(Come to think of it, how the heck did I get blonde children, and you didn’t?!)
Two from last night – since I’ve taken to blogging the dreams.
1) Rob and I are waiting for Exhubs to show up with the girls for 7pm. He shows up at 7:45, with them in their car seats, and a baby(?) nestled up in the back window, and a strange man in the passenger seat. When I ask why he didn’t call “It wasn’t important”, and when I ask about the baby not being in a car seat “Oh, it’s not mine.” .. (Like WTF?! It’s not like you’re holding a box for someone there!) and he clearly seems to be off character and under the influence. When the girls get upstairs they say that daddy’s boyfriend is scary, and makes daddy be scary too.
..I woke up.
2) I’m at work (ironically because I went in, forgetting I had booked the day off…)- and am alone out back having a cig when this girl who I used to work at Cordon Bleu with (and actually saw at the 10K this weekend) comes racing around asking if it’s OK to park in the lot – Exhubs is hurt!! (buh?) I tell her to park, and then Exhubs gimps up, and this girl starts asking me about insurance “If we were roller skating (it’s snowing in June in my dream..) and we went across an airfield (!) which we knew was dumb (yahuh.) and exhubs got hit, can we sue?
… no. You’re lucky to be alive. go away. Exhubs lights a cig (Very out of character!) She leaves and I ask Exhubs if she’s the next girl friend and he’s all “No, just some girl I’m putting it to on the side, the girlfriend’s home with her kid too much to keep me interested..but I’m calling my mom to send me money for a car seat for her kid. Will you install it?”
… I woke up, and decided I was done dreaming.
Clearly I’ve become very risk adverse, and a little crazy.
I am 15 weeks pregnant with my second child. Last night I had a dream that I gave birth ( still at 15 weeks ) and my baby was a fairly normal size despite being born so early. She had flaming orange hair which is weird because both my husband and I have brown hair. I put her in the car on a cold winter day to go somewhere, I’m not sure where but it was an all day thing. I forgot her in the car and after a few hours I realized what I had done and for the rest of the night, I was dreaming that I was trying to find my car. I wasn’t really that panicked and when I finally found her, she had died and was kind of shrivelled up with this huge mass of orange hair all around her.
How messed up is that??!!
Hi Tink,
Love it! See, these anxiety dreams are so common, and really just a way of trying to process the huge responsibility of becoming a mom.
Hi, Im 20 weeks pregnant and had a very strange dream the other night. I was in the delivery suite with my partner and i was in a position ready to give birth. I was strapped to machines breathing gas and air and the nurse was telling me when i had a contraction. I could feel like a dull period pain when the contractions were happening and i was sweating alot. There was a doctor in between my legs and he told me “one more push sweetie” but i wasnt in pain just this period pain. The next thing, he hands me a baby telling me its a girl and is 8lb2. she was covered in blood and stuff and was still attatched to the umbilical cord. He put her on my chest and she looked at me, she had the biggest blue eyes and lots of thick black hair!
Im confused as i woke up convinced id just gave birth!
can you tell me why i dreamt this?
I had a similar dream to Kimi a week ago (13 wks preg.) that I woke up and went into the guest bedroom. My parents (who live half-way across the country) were in there with a newborn baby boy. I asked my mom what happened because I didn’t remember having him and I didn’t feel like I’d just had a baby! My mom excitedly told me that I went to bed early the previous night, and at around 9pm she and my dad heard me rummaging around downstairs, and then they heard me throw up. So they came downstairs to check on me, and I had started going into labor. So they brought me to the hospital around 9:45pm and I had the baby at 4pm. I was so confused because I didn’t remember any of it and I felt like nothing had happened to my body at all!
Oh, and my husband was no where in the dream.
Then last night (@ 14 wks preg), I had a dream that I was at a restaurant with my parents, and they ordered food for me. They ordered me a shake and tasted like a normal, but really good shat. Then they told me it was a fish-shake, so I looked down and there was fish skin and scales in it. SO GROSS! And then the appetizer was fish, which looked gross, too. So I told them that if the main dish was seafood I was going to be really mad at them. Then the waiter came and brought be lobster, which didn’t look appetizing at all, so I was really upset with my parents for ordering all that gross fish for me! Haha… I generally like fish but this was all gross!
I had a dream that I was pregnant with my ex boyfriend’s baby, we even had a baby shower for it. Then somewhere in the dream I realized I wasn’t pregnant because I had gotten my period. I felt a huge sense of relief, but was guilty because i didn’t know how the pregnancy disappeared, because I clearly remember the doctor telling me I was pregnant. I don’t know what this all means?
I had my baby two weeks ago and I keep having weird dreams. I never had weird dreams during my pregnancy… I wake up almost every night thinking im already holding my baby in my arms. I even woke my fiancee up in my sleep to try and hand him the “crying baby that wasnt there.”
I dont understand…I did have some post pardum depression the first week and a half does this have to do with that?
Megaen,
First thing: Was your postpartum depression diagnosed and treated properly, or are you referring instead to the less serious “baby blues”? If it is in fact postpartum depression, hopefully you are still receiving treatment (for most women it’s psychotherapy, for some, medication also helps) — but the dream you describe is probably NOT related to depression. Having a baby around is such an enormous responsibility that new moms often can’t sleep well because they are thinking and worrying about their babies. The responsibility creeps into dreams and many, many new moms have dreams just like the one you describe — it’s a big learning curve, and just like learning any new thing you rehearse it in your mind for awhile. It’s like when I learned to ski, I dreamt about it at night for awhile.
My advice is to try to RELAX before you drop off to sleep, maybe do some meditation, yoga, warm bath, music, prayer, whatever works for you — AND get your partner to take over baby responsibilities for a few hours at a time at night, maybe from 8pm — 1 am, so you can sleep undisturbed for that time. Having a chunk of 4-5 hours sleep per night is MUCH better for your physical and mental health than getting up a million times every night. Even if you can do this a couple of times per week it will make all the difference!
Interestingly, the same thing will happen to your baby off and on over the next few years as he/she learns new skills — like sitting, crawling and walking. The baby’s sleep will be disturbed the same way yours is now. Keep it in mind for the future. And again, please make sure you’re current with your treatment for postpartum depression! 10-15 % pf new moms worldwide need the same treatment, some time during the first year after birth — VERY common, and VERY treatable! Thanks for commenting.
Aloha,
Dr. Heather
I am not sure if I am pregnant yet but these dreams could be a sign. I continuously dream of a pregnant belly which is in and of itself tame except it happens nightly. Last week I dreamed I was pregnant and in labor. My husband rushed me to the doctor where they checked me and I was four cm pregnant. I told them I wanted to see and they showed me in a mirror. I was then admitted. A few moments later I was starving and left for hummus. my husband didn’t want me to go but I insisted. later a robber tried to stop me and I said don’t f!@# with me I am in labor. I threatened that I.would vomit on him if he kept messing with me which I eventually did. my husband was livid saying I put myself and the baby in danger. then we went back to the hospital and my mom was mad at hubs for letting me leave.
Next dream: I was in a beautiful pea shaped wooden boat surrounded by a gorgeous tropical setting. then I saw a huge shadow beneath me. it reminded me of a mythical coy fish. the fishers who were with me wanted to catch it and it came up Jaws style and the fishermen were afraid. however the fish had tiny.teeth. I laughed at the.fishermen and smacked.the.fish.back onto the water.
last and most recent dream: I dreamed I was in labor and the baby was crowning. I literally was holding the baby in with my hand while waiting at the ER desk. the doctor wasn’t in a rush because he was checking charts. finally I gave birth standing and caught the baby. next the doctor was really concerned and he seemed squeamish. I then handing the tiny baby over which was.clearly a preemie and not breathing. the doctor tapped the baby on its chest and it began to breathe. next I looked to see the sex and there was nothing like a mannequin. then it morphed into a tiny vaa. afterwards I was in my room and the baby changed into a huge blistered lip thing with a mouth full of rotting teeth which I removed. As i breastfed the baby began changing its features. it had my husband’s nose but the huge blistered lips were there suckling my breast yet changing as I watched