Dr. Heather’s First Live TV Appearance

Despite awakening at 4 am with bloodshot eyes from an allergy attack (perfect for HDTV, right?) — I was psyched to head down to KITV yesterday morning to talk story with the gang about parenting. So mahalo to Jill Kuramoto for inviting me, and a big aloha to Mahealani Richardson, Moanike’ala Nabarro, and Yasmin Dar more »

What I’m Reading: Your One-Year-Old

I’m reading every parenting book ever written on an obsessive quest to find helpful nuggets and insights to include in my first BabyShrink book. Those of you who know me know that I think much of what’s available these days is garbage. Junk. Not practical. Not worth the money. But once in awhile, I find more »

Sleep, Toddlers, and Mental Health (Hopefully, Not Mutually Exclusive)

I’m blogging for mental health today — but not in way you might expect. Mental health isn’t just some esoteric list of psychiatric diagnoses. It starts with simple — but critically important — things. These include the support of loved ones, meaningful work and relationships, and enough resources to have a little fun. On the more »

Exciting Work — BabyShrink’s Updates

Whew, I’ve been busy! Make sure to check me out all month on ParentsConnect.com, the Nick Jr parenting blog. You know, “We’re not perfect, we’re parents.” We had an awesome connection over my “Good Enough” parenting posts, and it’s exciting to interact with so many of their families. It was all made possible by the more »

Sudden Fears in 12 to 15-Month-Old Babies

Let me tell you about a cool conversation I had the other day with my Infant Research/Rock Star Guru, Professor Joseph Campos (at UC Berkeley).  He helped me understand more about a funky phenomenon I’ve written about here before: The Weird, Wacky, Sudden Fears of the 12 — 15-month old. You know: Crazy fears of more »

Toddler Teeth-Grinding — How To Stop It

Another good question from the Parent Coaching files: Toddlers who grind their teeth. Why do they do it, and are we — as parents — doing anything to cause it? And more importantly, how can we get it to STOP?! For some, this is a nighttime tendency that seems to be hereditary. For others, it’s more »

Getting your preschooler to eat fruits and veggies

Direct from the Parent Coaching files, an issue that plagues many of us: The Preschooler Who Won’t Eat Healthy Foods. Common variants of this plague include The Preschooler Who Only Eats White Foods, The Preschooler Who Only Eats Starches, The Preschooler Who Only Eats Chicken Nuggets, and my niece’s current version: The Preschooler Who Only more »

Why Your 4-Year-Old Is So Awesome — Psychological Milestones

I’m really enjoying our 4-year-old. He’s sort of an “Entry-Level Kid” — no longer a squirelly toddler, he can join in the group for some fun, manage his feelings pretty well, and tells silly stories that have us rolling. Common parenting wisdom has remedies for the “Terrible Twos.” But they leave out the “Terrible THREES,” more »

When Your Toddler Looks Tired — But Won’t Nap

It was 2 pm, and my toddler STILL hadn’t gone down for her nap. Routines were followed, milk was drunk, and the house was quiet (no small feat around here, I assure you). She was rubbing her eyes, complaining — but plowing ahead. Throwing her little arms in the air, she was chanting, “Up! Up!” more »

When and How To Get Rid Of Your Toddler’s “Lovey” — AKA “The Comfort Thingie”

The “Comfort Thingie” — your toddler’s thumb, binkie, blanket or other “lovey” — is a vexing problem to most parents. Usually yucky, stinky, shredded and gross, we’d love to chuck it, but Toddler would FREAK. HOW to get rid of it? WHEN is it OK to get rid of it? And WHY does she need more »

How To Handle Sibling Rivalry — Toddler Style

I love it when parents say, “Our toddler is SO happy that she has a little baby brother. She seems to have accepted him totally!” Just wait. Sibling rivalry usually doesn’t become a problem until your toddler has to contend with a mobile baby –one who gets into her stuff, pulls her hair, and otherwise more »

Another Reason Your Toddler Doesn’t Eat Much

I’ve just had a rare parenting experience; making a meal that my toddler ate — and enjoyed. Pediatricians tell us that toddlers need fewer calories, so not to worry. But there’s another more developmental reason that toddlers often don’t eat. The “simple” cycle of HUNGER —–> EATING —–> FEELING BETTER isn’t really so simple for more »

How To Handle Sibling Rivalry: When Toddler Bashes Baby (or Preschooler Bashes Toddler)

Shawn poses as this unassuming urban Dad who backpacks around with his two young kids while his wife toils away at a high-powered job. But in reality, he’s scary-smart, this close to getting his PhD at Stanford, in philosophy — of all things. He can write (and backpack) circles around me, and in the couple more »

Enter to Win Free Parent Coaching, BabyShrink Style!

Got a baby, toddler, or preschooler — and a dilemma? Want some feedback — geared towards your hopes, needs and family style? I’ve helped thousands of families, and by popular demand, I’m opening Parent Coaching up to my BabyShrink audience. To kick it off, I’m launching a contest. Sign up by commenting below — tell more »

“Perfectionism” in A 2-Year Old?

Longtime reader Katie has asked me about her baby before. But now that her daughter is an honest-to-goodness toddler, there are new questions about perfectionism. Babies don’t care about “the rules” — toddlers do. And so a new struggle with “doing it right — by myself” begins: Dear Dr. Heather, For the past few nights more »

When Baby Prefers One Parent: What To Do?

Dear Dr. Heather, Our 25-month-old granddaughter has an unusually strong attachment to her mother. Her parents have been very responsive to her since her birth. Our toddler is easy with other people including her regular caregiver, grand-parents, other extended family and just about everyone else. The problem is that when her mother is around she more »

Dr. Heather in Parents Magazine, August Issue

Thanks to Parents Magazine and Sharlene Johnson for giving me the opportunity to be the “Q and A” expert on a topic we’re all familiar with…The Dawdling Toddler. Pick up a copy anywhere magazines are sold, and let us know YOUR suggestions for getting your toddler out the door in the morning. Aloha, Dr. Heather more »

The Quotable Parent: Fabulous Fraiberg #6: Why Your Toddler Won’t Sleep

zzzzzz…….Excuse me, I was just dozing off. I haven’t been able to get much sleep over the past, say, 10 years or so (I keep having babies, what can I say) — and the pursuit of sleep, because of unwilling babies and toddlers, has become an obsession for me. Unfortunately, there’s no holy grail, but more »

The Quotable Parent: Fabulous Fraiberg #5. Why Your Toddler is So “Negative”

Here’s a continuation of the previous quote from Fraiberg. I try to keep this in mind while wrestling with the baby at diaper-changing time: The chief characteristic of the second year is not negativism but a powerful striving to become a person and to establish permanent bonds with the world of reality. We must remember more »

The Quotable Parent: The Fabulous Fraiberg #4 — Why your toddler says NO

Toddlers say “NO” with such glee. It’s clear that they’ve discovered a powerful tool when they start to randomly chant “no no no….” like the words to a song repeated ad nauseum, meant to irritate us parents. Here’s what the Fabulous Fraiberg had to say about the issue: So the toddler, with only a few more »

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